You can lead a horse to water, as the saying goes, but you cannot make it drink.
I have to keep this always in mind when someone asks my advice.
Sometimes they are pleading, desperate for help. It’s their last chance, they tell me. Things have to change. They need help now!
So I give it.
Either in the form of personal advice, or by encouraging them to enrol in one of my many programs.
Then what happens?
Well, of course, some avail of the fountain of knowledge 😊, get great results, and get their problems solved.
We love students who are prepared to put in the work! Like these:
“Many thanks - you have been a brilliant help and a breath of fresh air of information!”
“I've found your emails very helpful and am trying hard to implement.”
“I've been following your steps for four weeks now. Thank you very much for your guidance! It's been very helpful in sorting out Fitz's problems. You've been so helpful and I cannot thank you enough.”
“Your guidelines have been very helpful and reassuring for us to keep at this. Thank you.”
But it’s not a magic bullet.
Nothing happens unless the owner changes.
It’s not the dog who needs to change - it’s you!
As Wayne Dyer put it so succinctly:
When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.
What about those who don’t want to work?
As you know, I’m passionate about improving the lot of dogs.
And that means improving their home situation. It’s not a question of teaching the dog without referencing the whole environment. (That’s why residential training is a big no-no and doesn’t work.)
There’s so much misinformation about, and nobody can be blamed for doing it wrong when they were following guidance and trying their best. Once they arrive with me, we have a clean slate. We start from where we are.
But what I find very sad is when someone comes in desperation, asking for help. They are given appropriate help . . . and that’s the last I see of them.
As the Irish have it, some people don’t have the manners they were born with!
There’s never any excuse for not responding - even if it’s a Thanks but no thanks.
People who enrol in a program, ask for specific help - which is given to them in spades - then .. disappear.
Possibly worse are those who come back a year, two years later, with the exact same issue they first wanted help on. Only now the problem is entrenched. I think, “Why oh why didn’t you deal with this when we gave you the answers?!”
Oceans of help are washing over you, and you aren’t even getting wet.
And of course the reason is that they thought it was a problem with the dog, and not a problem with themselves.
They thought that just asking the question, getting it off their chest, would be the solution.
They didn’t factor in that THEY needed to do the work!
If you leave it alone, it won’t magically improve by itself.
We have to put the work in!
Are Agility World Champions just dogs who enjoy jumping? No! They are dogs who have handlers who work with them tirelessly to maximise their potential (and as long as the dog is enjoying it, that’s great.)
What about tracking dogs, like the police use? Search & Rescue dogs? Are they just dogs who enjoy mooching about sniffing things? No! They’re trained professionally, to an extraordinarily high standard. Someone’s life may depend on it.
Easy dogs
It’s true that some dogs are easier than others. They slip into the household and comply with everything without demur.
But most dogs (like most children, it must be said!) need quantities of teaching to shape them into the person we want to live with.
And this is where you come in.
Just like with those children, you can’t hand them a book and let them get on with it!
It’s hands-on, everyday, one-to-one, relationship-building and teaching.
Zig Ziglar has it well:
“If you are not willing to learn, no one can help you.
If you are determined to learn, no one can stop you.”
Do you genuinely need help?
If you do, then you’ve arrived in the right place! And you’re very welcome.
There’s nothing I and my team like better than helping someone turn their life around with their dog.
And so often, it’s changing the way the owner views things (as Wayne Dyer says, above) that makes all the difference!
“Just acknowledging she's reactive on the leash, and still a wonderful dog was the best place to start for us.“
“I found it hard to accept that I did not have an easygoing 'normal' dog but once I accepted her for what she is it felt easier.”
“I've watched your free Workshop three times it's so good. Working now on training myself!”
So - are you determined to learn? Welcome to Brilliant Family Dog!
You can choose from free courses, premium video courses, books or audiobooks direct from the author. We have something to suit every learning style!
See you soon . . .