Is your new dog not as easy as your old dog?

Got a new puppy?

Exciting!

All your hopes for the perfect dog rest in this wide-eyed little ball of fluff!

And as soon as you get started with him, he fails.

But how on earth can an 8-week-old puppy be failing? 😱

He wees everywhere, he chews everything, he pulls on the lead, he keeps you awake and barks the house down when you leave …

This may all be true (HINT: it needn’t be! Your new puppy can be sleeping through the night from Day 1, never chew anything you don’t want him to, walk nicely on the lead, and be comfortable in your absence - start the Brilliant Family Dog program by watching this free Workshop)

So - maybe it’s true. But the reason you think your little puppy is failing, being difficult, challenging, awkward, time-consuming, and all the rest - is because you are comparing him with your previous dog!

Your old dog

Your old dog was perfect in every way.

Fitted your household like an old slipper.

• Never chewed anything

• Always asked if he needed to go out

• Walked nicely beside you and never ran off

• Slept like a log and greeted you happily when you came home.

And this too may be true.

But your old dog was 14 (or 12 or 17) when he died. He’d spent his whole life learning how to rub along with you.

And you’ve TOTALLY forgotten the anguish and trouble of his puppyhood!

You are seeing your lovely old pet through rose-tinted spectacles.

 Of course he took time to housetrain!

Of course he chewed things (whether they were things you wanted him to chew or things he stole is entirely down to your supervision at the time)

Of course he hauled you about on the lead (until you taught him different)

Of course the baby cried when you left him, till he learnt to trust you.

This is a NEW puppy

This is a NEW puppy. A NEW person. Yes, he’s a dog, and he may even be the same breed as your previous dog, but he is an individual.

And he needs to be treated and loved as an individual.

Not continually compared with the paragon which was your last dog in his last years.

For me, this is the joy of having a new puppy! A new person to get to know - his fears, his foibles, his character - what he enjoys, what he loves.

Your old dog was wonderful and your new dog will be wonderful too.

Just cut him some slack and learn with him and here’s that free Workshop where you can begin your journey with your new puppy:

Here’s a free Workshop to

get you started.

“Pandemic puppies” are now coming home to roost

Who do you know who became a first-time dog owner during lockdowns? There are about a million in the UK alone, according to evidence being given to a Commons (British Government) Select Committee investigating pet welfare and abuse.

Sadly, the huge demand for dogs when people were feeling lonely in the pandemic led to massive growth in the shadier sides of dog supply, from puppy farming to feed the demand for fashionable “designer dogs” (and there have been some high-profile shockers exposed recently, even in the dog training world) to the wholesale importation of random street dogs from other countries.

In both of these cases, the dogs are the ones who suffered most.

In the puppy farms the bitches and dogs suffer abuse and mistreatment. Along with their puppies they endure a deprived existence. What damage this does to the pups’ state of mind! What hope for them to become a well-adjusted adult dog?

The mass importation of any street-dog that can be netted and caught, mostly from East European countries with a poor reputation for animal treatment, leads to predictable problems of acclimatisation. Dogs who have known only fear and privation do not become perfect British pet dogs overnight!

But now the new owners are suffering!

Many of these first-time dog purchasers had done no homework. They had no idea about dog and puppy developmental stages, dog socialisation and habituation, suitable ways to rear a “normal” dog, and specialist ways to rehabilitate an abused or deprived dog.

They bought into the image of the perfect companion, apparently totally unaware that a dog can take from 18 to 36 months to mature and become anything resembling the finished article.

Many of these folk didn’t do what they should have been doing for their new dog, and this has naturally resulted in problem behaviours in some dogs - anything from separation anxiety to aggressive behaviour, not to mention incomplete housetraining, inappropriate playbiting, hauling them about on the lead, and zero recall.

So it’s no surprise that now people have gone back to work and are no longer lonely, the shelters are bulging with abandoned dogs.

Get a vet check!

One of those giving evidence, Dr. Gaines of the RSPCA, advised “anyone who had seen sudden behaviour changes in their dog to go to a vet, who will be able to rule out any medical causes.

“If the dog gets a clean bill of health, the owner should then seek help from an animal behaviour specialist, preferably one that is a member of the Animal Behaviour and Training Council.” (I’m a member of the ABTC.)

Note that Dr. Gaines does not want you to get behaviour modification advice or training from your vet! Their skills lie elsewhere. It’s a qualified trainer you need!

One of the problems with these pandemic puppies is that prices sky-rocketed due to the headlong rush to grab a dog - any dog - so that as well as getting a poor specimen in many cases, people had no money left for veterinary care or learning how to get the best out of their life with their dog, aka dog training.

Shady practices

Dealing with these heartless people who view dogs as commodities, simply there to make them money for the least amount of effort, is gradually being addressed by the lawmakers.

Puppy farming is a loathsome practice, and results only in distress for the “products” (dogs) and the “consumers” (people).

Capturing feral dogs and transporting them in large numbers across Europe in the back of a van is equally as abhorrent. Many dog trainers earn a lot of their (usually modest) incomes from trying to rehabilitate these unfortunate victims of the demand for dogs.

Dogs can actually learn all through their lives - though the worse the start the harder the change can be to accomplish. But never give up hope! There are wonderful kind and dog-friendly ways to help your dog cope with our strange world.

So where can I get a dog?

You can go to a proper breeder and get a puppy that has been reared with knowledge and with love. This normally means someone who breeds only when they want to keep a puppy themselves. Not someone with sheds full of random bitches kept in the dark.

Remember that in the UK Lucy’s Law requires that the mother should be seen with the puppies. Lots of dog greeders will come up with any excuse for not doing this - along with many other tricks of the trade - and some will park any old dog with the pups in order to deceive. You really do need advice from an experienced dog-person! Here’s an article to help you weave your way through the maze.

The shelters are bulging with rejected dogs right now, and yes, many of them will be foreign imports, so if you’re desperate for some reason to adopt a street-dog or a so-called designer dog, you can still do so without encouraging this dodgy trade.

Need a bit of help?

And if you’re having trouble with your dog, whether a pandemic puppy or not, we can help you! There are over 300 articles here at www.brilliantfamilydog.com and we have free workshops, masterclasses, email courses, books, and guides, along with low-cost online programs and books. Have a look at the menu at the top of this page to see them all.

There’s no need to miss out on getting a great life with your chosen pet, however inauspicious the start!

Here’s a free Workshop to get you started.

Work with the dog you’ve got .. Not the one you thought you were getting!

I can’t tell you how many times people tell me that their new dog doesn’t measure up to their old dog.

Sometimes they’re comparing their new puppy with a devoted and much-loved pet who died aged 15, having spent his last few years in a quiet retirement.

He fitted their family like an old shoe.

And, unaccountably, they expect the new puppy to take up where the old dog left off, complete with the lifetime’s learning.

When you look at it, you can see how daft this is!

But we seldom look at things this clearly.

We so enjoyed life with the old dog that we’d like to carry it on uninterrupted.

And when you step back and reflect, you can see clearly that this is an unrealistic expectation to place on the newcomer’s shoulders.

But it doesn’t seem to stop us doing it!

Hidden standards for our dogs

There’s also the fact that you get your dog with a vision of your future together.

🐾 This may include an active dog sport … and your dog turns out to have bad hips and can’t compete.

 🐾 It may be long tramps over hill and moor … and you got a lapdog who is quite unsuited to this.

🐾 Or it may be that you enjoy social activities with friends and their dogs .. and your dog is of a nervous and timorous disposition and does not enjoy these outings one bit.

Reality check!

The thing is, you have to work with the dog in front of you, not the one you wish you had! 

You can never turn an apple into an orange, however hard you try.

And you can’t change your dog’s intrinsic nature. That is doomed to failure.

You can certainly teach him, and improve things - dramatically!

But he’s still who he is.

And accepting this is the only way forward.

“But all my dogs love xyz!”

That doesn’t mean that this one will - or indeed should!

How many times do you see children in the same family - same parents, same school, same ethos, same upbringing - but who are polar opposites in character?

You can have all the nature vs nurture discussions you like, but when it comes down to it, your dog (or child) is who he is, and the sooner you accept that and discard your rose-spectacled vision of who you thought he should be, the better!

Enjoy the journey!

And part of living with another creature is finding out what makes them tick. What they like. What they don’t like. How to please them, and how not to upset them. 

Judging your dog will never help!

Your new dog will never measure up to the memory of your old dog.

Don’t set him a target he can never reach.

Instead, rejoice in his individuality and work with the dog who’s right there, in front of you (or on your lap).

That’s the way to find true harmony with your new dog.

Need a bit of help with a Growly Dog? Watch our free Masterclass and talk to us in the chat about your particular issues with your dog.

We’d love to help you make the changes you’re looking for.

Teaching your dog impulse control through tug - 10 STEPS

Would you love to be able to play with your dog without toothmarks all over your hands and arms, rips in your clothes, and your shoe-laces being undone?

There is a WAY to teach this! Phew!

Many folk think you just waggle a toy in your dog’s face and all will be sunlight and joy as they gently tug the toy, let go as soon as you ask, and patiently wait to be offered it again.

Well - I have news for you . . . You can get all those things (without the “waggling in the face” bit, which no-one would like) by following a few basic rules. What’s more, those rules will extend to every part of your life with your dog. Dogs’ teeth should never touch human skin, and we have great ways for your dog to learn this - all without force or intimidation (or yelling).

And you can see my puppy waiting for the game to start in the picture above.

Instinctive Drives

The thing is, you are harnessing a very strong instinctive drive in your dog, and turning it to your advantage instead of trying to work against it.

All dogs, whatever the breed or type, have the same instinctive drive - to locate prey, stalk it, chase it, catch it, and kill it.

But dogs have been bred for generations to stop at different points in that sequence - Border Collies, for instance, locate, stalk, and chase sheep, but stop short of grabbing them. Gundogs may be only required to locate the prey, or to bring it back undamaged. Terriers on the other hand are required to simply clear the barn of rats, so they do the whole sequence.

It’s because it’s hardwired that this is the best game of all for your dog, and they learn it really fast!

.          

In the Brilliant Family Dog Academy we go into detail on just how to teach this, with the full 10 rules - yes, 10 of them that you need to follow - carefully taught, along with personal tuition and troubleshooting for serious mouthers!

How does this teach impulse control to your dog? Well, he has to WAIT to be able to grab the toy. That is good early learning for any puppy who wants something. If he pounces as soon as he sees his prey, rather than lining it up and thinking about it, the bunny will probably hop away. Taking time to assess the situation is vital!

Then he learns to tug with you with equal strength. You don’t want your big dog pulling you over! It’s a game - that means you both enjoy it.

And of course, he learns to release instantly on request .. and not to try and grab it again! That’s when a lot of bitey damage can be done.

If you try to snatch something away from a dog, whether it’s a toy, your shoe, a baby, a kitten - you are stimulating the chase-and-grab instinct. So there’s a way to do this without provoking that reaction - and we can show you!

Not only will you be able to play enjoyable tuggie games with your dog, but you’ll also be able to ask him to give you whatever’s in his mouth if you’re worried he’s picked up something dangerous. Double whammy.

10 Steps for playing Tug

Teach your impulsive dog impulse control

Coco at 15 weeks pulls hard on the tug

1. Choose a toy that is soft on  the mouth, long enough for   you to be able to stand up while playing, keeping teeth at one end and hand at the other. It needs to be narrow enough for your dog to grab it easily. Fleece plaits are excellent, a soft toy like a monkey with long flappy legs, or sheepskin or rabbitskin tug. It’s your toy. You allow your dog to play with it when you want, and only if he keeps to the rules. Because it’s never left on the floor - and the only time your dog gets to play with the tug is with you on the end of it - it becomes a very high-value toy.

2. You are harnessing a very strong instinctive drive in your dog, and turning it to your advantage instead of trying to work against it. All dogs, whatever the breed or type, have the same instinctive drive - to locate prey, stalk it, chase it, pounce, catch it, and kill it. Dogs have been bred to stop at different points in that sequence - Border Collies, for instance, locate, stalk, and chase sheep, but stop short of grabbing them. Terriers on the other hand are required to simply clear the barn of rats, so they do the whole sequence. It’s because it’s hardwired that this is the best game of all for your dog.

3. When playing, always keep the tuggie low on the floor - this is to prevent your pup jumping and injuring himself as he lands. It also keeps the teeth pointing downwards and he’s less likely to grab your hand or sleeve. You’ll get hurt if he’s leaping up to catch the toy.

Coco starts to chase the toy 

4. Start by snaking the tuggie around on the floor, like a rabbit or a rat. Remember, rabbits don’t lollop along and jump into dogs’ mouths!

5. So don’t flap the toy in his face. Wiggle and jerk it around on the floor simulating a rodent’s action - stop, twitch whiskers, run - this is what stimulates the chase instinct and is the signal to play. You never let go of the tug. It may take a while for your puppy, or a dog new to play, to chase - and he may start by pouncing and stamping on the toy. Now encourage that chase and he’ll soon be grabbing it with his mouth.

6. Encourage your dog to grip tight on the tug. Pull just enough to get him pulling back, and if he lets go: “Oh, you lost your dinner!” and start again. Have a great game, but don’t be too rough or hurt his teeth. Growling is part of the game - you can growl too.

7. When you’re ready, relax your pull so the tuggie goes limp (animal now dead) and hold a treat to your dog’s nostrils. Some dogs cannot let go if the tug is taut. As he lets go to eat the treat, put the tuggie behind your back - not past your face! The reward for letting go? Your dog gets to play again!

8. Bring the tug out from behind your back, and tease him a little with it around your waist-height. If he tries to grab it, it goes straight behind your back (never past your face). Repeat till he shows that he wants it but is not jumping or grabbing, then immediately whack it to the floor - game on! He doesn’t have to sit or stay - just show that he wants it, but he’s not going to snatch it. He’ll soon learn that he only gets the toy when it’s whacked on the ground. This is a great protection for small children carrying teddy bears about, and for your sleeves.

Coco waits for the game to start again

9. As you both become more expert at this game - which should become your dog’s top favourite - you can use the cue "Geddit" as you whack the tuggie to the ground, and "Give" as your empty hand approaches his nose. In time you can offer him the toy off the ground, so long as he knows he can never grab it. Sometimes, cover the toy with your hand and watch your dog working out how to hold it without touching you.

10. If his teeth touch your hand or sleeve, your dog will be aware, so shriek to interrupt him, put tug behind your back, and wait for a moment for calm before offering it again. He should now be much more careful. If he’s over the top, put it away till later. He may be too tired to play nicely. If a puppy can’t control his teeth, it usually means he’s overtired and needs a zizz in his crate.

Want to learn more like this?

Get our Guide: 10 Ways to Stop Puppy Biting here!

“My dog doesn’t like food”

This statement is usually made by people who think that reward-based training won’t work for them, as their dog “doesn’t like food”, or “won’t eat”.

If their dog really doesn’t like food at all, I guess he’s not long for this world!

But they usually mean that their dog has no interest in treats, or - more likely - no interest in treats when out.

There are two things at play here.

1. What treats are you offering?

2. What is happening to cause your dog not to want them when out?

Point 1: What treats?

Let’s look at Point 1 first - it’s the easy one, and most easily resolved.

If you want to reward your dog, you have to use something he finds rewarding!

Obvious, you may think, yet apparently not so.

I would not find oranges remotely rewarding, for instance, good though they may be. But chocolate … ah, now I’ll jump through hoops for you!

So you have to work through a bit of trial and error to find what your dog really likes. Of course he may prefer playing with a toy, and that’s fine - but for many things we want to teach, rewarding with food is by far the most efficient and fast method.

With my puppy I’ve been using a great variety to see what hits the spot. Fingerfuls of his raw food are always a hit, or snipped up bits of chicken carcase (wings are easiest). But I also use dried liver, dried sprats, cheese, sausage, and high-quality kibble or treats for everyday rewards. The best stuff is kept for the most challenging situations, and for teaching something new.

Once they get the “cue-MARK-reward” sequence, you can use absolutely anything for your reward. It’s the cue that actually becomes the reward in their brain. The cue may be a vocal cue like SIT; or a hand signal; or an environmental signal, like hand on door-handle - see this post for training your dog to sit and wait at all doors.

If someone invites you to a party, you are happy and excited right away. You don’t stay dull and ordinary for two weeks till after the party, then become excited!

That’s a juicy bit of science for you to digest. And this is why dog training becomes easier and easier, and it’s less and less important what treat you choose.

Though I do emphasise that in distracting or challenging situations (for some dogs this is anything outdoors) and for teaching something new, you need the “crack cocaine cookies” (thanks Susan Garrett!)

Point 2: So why won’t he eat them?

If someone were holding a gun to your head, would you be inclined to accept my piece of chocolate cake, however gooey?

If you thought you saw a rat running across your path, would you enjoy a chat and a biscuit?

No! You have to be in a relaxed and receptive state of mind to take food (unless you are literally starving).

If you’re distracted, frightened, thought you just heard something spooky, you’re not going to have any interest in taking food.

The first thing on your agenda may be survival! Fight or flight! Freeze or Flock (cling to someone safe)!

So you’ll need to get your dog out of this situation which is overwhelming him before you can have any hope of him accepting a reward.

a) If he’s frightened or anxious, your dog is in an emotional state.

b) If he’s comfortable and learning, he’s in an operant state.

In simple terms, in a) he is unable to make decisions. Rewards are inappropriate.

In b) he is operating on his environment and experience of the moment and is making decisions for which he may be rewarded.  

Because as we know, that which is rewarded is more likely to be repeated.

We go into much more detail on the science behind dog training, and just why your dog does what he does, when he does, in the Brilliant Family Dog Academy.

Want to learn more? Start with our free Workshop which will give you some techniques along with the science behind them.

Where should you get your dog advice?

I was distressed recently by a reader.

Now I have to say I love answering readers’ queries, and helping them get the best for their dog and themselves, in their particular circumstances. ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

If they’re asking it’s because they realise they don’t know the answer, and want help. But sometimes you get someone who doesn’t want to learn . . .

This person wanted to know why her 8-week-old medium-size puppy cried all its first night. I asked her a few questions while giving her resources. It seems this tiny puppy had been fed six hours before bedtime and was expected to last on this till the next morning.

No wonder it couldn’t sleep!

The poor puppy was starving!

At that age it should have been on 4-5 meals a day. I explained this to my correspondent, giving resources again.

And she replied that the vet had said this 8-week-old puppy should be fed half a cup of food twice a day only. For English readers, this would be about 3.5 oz of food in total - enough to keep a sparrow alive.

Clearly no proper vet would say such a daft thing! She simply must have misunderstood somehow.

To cheer you up in this tale of woe, here’s a nice full puppy sleeping!

By the way, for English readers, here’s a load of money off a super food I regularly use and here’s another where you can get a big discount using this link - they provide high-quality fishy treats and foods, which are firm favourites with my crew!

But it set me thinking …

In this case the vet was asked about feeding - something that should come squarely within the vet’s remit.

But so often people take behaviour advice from their breeder (that’s fine if it’s a real breeder and not a puppy farmer or designer-dog “greeder”), or their groomer, or their vet, or the milkman . . .

Behaviour advice should be taken from people who are trained in dog behaviour!

Simple as that!

😳 You wouldn’t ask your hairdresser about a skin disease - you’d go to the doctor.

😮 You wouldn’t ask your gardener why your house is falling down - you’d go to a builder or engineer.

So please - don’t take behaviour advice from anyone but a qualified dog trainer/behaviourist!

And if the advice you get makes no sense (who’d feed a small baby twice a day with a set amount of food?) don’t do it!

***

Footnote: What happened to that puppy? I have no idea. The owner told me my advice would only work for people who didn’t work, then unsubscribed. Presumably they leave the puppy alone all day while they’re out - afraid, lost, and starving. So upsetting . . .

I do what I can to change people’s approach to dogs. One dog at a time. This was one I couldn’t reach.

But hey! You’re reading this, so you understand and know just what I mean!

We have to keep spreading the word.

And if you know someone who’s just got a puppy and is struggling - send them here so they can start the right way!