dog behaviour

How much does your dog sleep?


I make no apologies for revisiting this vital subject! So many of the queries I get can be resolved by simply allowing or encouraging your dog to sleep more!

Dogs need 17 hours of sleep a day to function well.

And this doesn’t mean snatched minutes of shut-eye when nothing is happening for a few moments!

It means proper, deep, uninterrupted sleep, for at least an hour at a time - and, of course, all night!

Teach ‘em young

And this doesn’t just happen without careful management.

In the same way that most responsible parents manage their babies’ and toddlers’ sleep sessions, teaching them that a sleep will cure lots of upsets, we have to teach our puppies how to manage themselves.

This is valuable learning.

We put small children in cots to make sure they can’t race around exhausting themselves when they need to rest.

In the same way, we can use crates or playpens to manage our puppies - who often won’t stop till they’re nailed to the floor!

I honestly don’t know how anyone manages a puppy without a crate or a playpen! I think that without these terrific aids we’re giving ourselves a huge amount of extra work and stress.

 

If you struggled to manage your youngster over the holiday period, now is the time to double down on teaching him or her how to sleep.

 

💤 Alone.  

💤  Contained.

💤 Without you.

💤 Without distraction.


You’ll be so glad you did!

And for more gems on managing your dog, check out the how-to books here!

Check other post that might help your brilliant dogs:

I have a new puppy: will I ever get any sleep again?

How much time does your dog spend sleeping?

Errorless Housetraining and Crate Training

Puppy Crate training demystified

I love my dog AND I love my sleep!

 

Do you hit your dog?

Read this post to see where you may unwittingly be demolishing your precious relationship with your dog!  Brilliant Family Dog is committed to improving the lives of dogs and their harassed owners through books and online learning, all force-free and

Of course you don’t hit your dog!

You wouldn’t be here in Brilliant Family Dog if you did!

But the thing is, you don’t need to actually hit someone for them to feel bad about you.

This is so for dogs as well as for people.

 

Different forms of punishment

So you may ignore your dog. Lots of “dog trainers” tell you to do that.

Now imagine how you’d feel if a loved one ignored you! Refused to speak to you!

🐕 Wouldn’t you creep and crawl inside?

🐕 Feel like a worm?

🐕 Wonder what you’ve done to upset them?

🐕 No idea how to put things right?

That’s just how your dog would feel!

I think that if I offended someone, I’d much rather they explained to me how I had done so, so that I could put it right in the future, and not repeat my mistake.

So you can do the exact same with your dog.

Just show him that what he did didn’t work. Ask him again, and when he gives the smallest hint of doing what you’d prefer, reward that - fast and fully!

Dogs are Doers. They are not Not-Doers.

 

Leaving your dog in a vacuum of silence will not help him understand one bit.

 

Old saws are not necessarily right!

There’s a saying: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”

I couldn’t disagree more!

How someone feels about you is so important to you! If someone is unkind to you, or unfair, doesn’t that hurt? With real pain?

If they say harsh things, wag a finger, shout in your face, isn’t that frightening?

Your dog is the same!

 

Punishment rewards the punisher

You see, punishment rewards the punisher.

The only person who benefits is the person doing the punishing, in whatever form - whether hitting, shouting, abusing, belittling - they are the ones who get a gratifying feeling. Some even get a visceral thrill.

While punishment does little good to the one being punished.

Yes - it may temporarily suppress behaviour (just long enough for the so-called trainer to cash your cheque) - in the presence of the punisher. But it’s not going to stop it, because there is no CHOICE involved on the part of the victim.

Giving your dog, or child, or friend, or colleague, a choice in how they respond is critical for them to learn and want to repeat that choice.

 

Losing your temper

Yep! I put my hand up, along with the rest of the universe! We can all lose our temper, get frustrated, reach the end of our tether.

But if you give in to the moment and - even just yell at your dog - how does it make you feel?

Do you feel proud of yourself?

Or do you realise that you have just taken a chunk out of your relationship with your dog, which will have to be restored double-quick?

And what if children were watching? What have they learnt, about you, about how to manage people, how to manage animals?

What if another adult was watching? What do they now think of you? Do you like what they’re thinking?

Looking at things from an outside point of view can help us see more clearly what we are doing!

Yes, we can all have uncharacteristic outbursts. But before you justify yourself to yourself by saying the dog was driving you mad, was not listening, was being deliberately difficult - keep in mind that your dog is from another species. He doesn’t understand verbal language (he associates sounds, sure, but not as we do).

We are honoured to be able to forge an unbreakable bond with the dog in our care.

We are blessed to have this learning every day - of working out why creatures (people or dogs) do what they do, and how we can get them to fit in with our plans without any coercion, force, or intimidation.

 

Gobbledygook!

And if this all sounds like outer gobbledygook, do watch my free Workshop here . It shows you what may possibly be a new way to relate to your dog.

As this correspondent says:


“Your teaching is a revelation! Honestly I’ve spent 40 years doing what I thought was right. Now, as soon as my new puppy chooses to do something I want she gets a reward. I hope - thanks to you - I’m getting it more right than I used to.” JP

And that dog-owner had learnt all that from my books! Want to see what you can learn too? Head over to this page. And we can both benefit from you buying direct from the author (that's me!)


 
 

 

 

Where should you get your dog advice?

It’s important to understand things like sleeping and feeding as soon as you can. We have lots of resources to help you with your precious new puppy.  Brilliant Family Dog is committed to improving the lives of dogs and their harassed owners through



I was distressed recently by a reader.

Now I have to say I love answering readers’ queries, and helping them get the best for their dog and themselves, in their particular circumstances. ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

If they’re asking it’s because they realise they don’t know the answer, and want help. But sometimes you get someone who doesn’t want to learn . . .

This person wanted to know why her 8-week-old medium-size puppy cried all its first night. I asked her a few questions while giving her resources. It seems this tiny puppy had been fed six hours before bedtime and was expected to last on this till the next morning.

No wonder it couldn’t sleep!

The poor puppy was starving!

At that age it should have been on 4-5 meals a day. I explained this to my correspondent, giving resources again.

And she replied that the vet had said this 8-week-old puppy should be fed half a cup of food twice a day only. For English readers, this would be about 3.5 oz of food in total - enough to keep a sparrow alive.

Clearly no proper vet would say such a daft thing! She simply must have misunderstood somehow.

It’s important to understand things like sleeping and feeding as soon as you can. We have lots of resources to help you with your precious new puppy.  Brilliant Family Dog is committed to improving the lives of dogs and their harassed owners through

To cheer you up in this tale of woe, here’s a nice full puppy sleeping!

By the way, for English readers, here’s a load of money off a super food I regularly use and here’s another where you can get a big discount using this link - they provide high-quality fishy treats and foods, which are firm favourites with my crew!

But it set me thinking …

In this case the vet was asked about feeding - something that should come squarely within the vet’s remit.

But so often people take behaviour advice from their breeder (that’s fine if it’s a real breeder and not a puppy farmer or designer-dog “greeder”), or their groomer, or their vet, or the milkman . . .

Behaviour advice should be taken from people who are trained in dog behaviour!

 

Simple as that!

😳 You wouldn’t ask your hairdresser about a skin disease - you’d go to the doctor.

😮 You wouldn’t ask your gardener why your house is falling down - you’d go to a builder or engineer.

So please - don’t take behaviour advice from anyone but a qualified dog trainer/behaviourist!

And if the advice you get makes no sense (who’d feed a small baby twice a day with a set amount of food?) don’t do it!

 

***

 

Footnote: What happened to that puppy? I have no idea. The owner told me my advice would only work for people who didn’t work, then unsubscribed. Presumably they leave the puppy alone all day while they’re out - afraid, lost, and starving. So upsetting . . .

I do what I can to change people’s approach to dogs. One dog at a time. This was one I couldn’t reach.

 

But hey! You’re reading this, so you understand and know just what I mean!

We have to keep spreading the word.

 

And if you know someone who’s just got a puppy and is struggling - send them here so they can start the right way!

 

 

 

 
 

Can you take your dog everywhere?

It’s a lovely thought!

We get a dog to be our companion, to be with us all the time, to accompany us on trips to the cafe, the pub, the family, the local fair …

And then reality hits.

THIS dog, the one you’ve got, is not quite what you expected!

He doesn’t like noisy children, he finds strangers approaching him worrying, he’s anxious about other dogs, and as for the bangs and mock-fighting and hullabaloo at the historical re-enactment you were dying to go to - horrors!

Maybe you do have a super-sociable dog. Maybe he just loves everyone. But you still may reach his limit if you take him on a long excursion to a rowdy place.

You may be enjoying looking at those stands of goodies, but does he like being squashed between so many people’s legs? Down there at ground level where he can’t see a thing, possibly getting enthusiastic greetings from children or other dogs. You’re busy admiring the offerings at the market or fete, so it’s hard to notice this in time, and guard against anything untoward.

What’s sauce for the goose may well not be sauce for the gander!

“I want to be alone!”

Then you have to look at your dog who just plain doesn’t like crowds.

You did all the right things with socialising her, but she still doesn’t like some of the things you’d like to do with her.

Imagine that was you.

Imagine your family insisted on dragging you round somewhere you hated. A family member who’s mad about motorcycles dragging you off to Brands Hatch, Silverstone, or Mondello Park? The smells, the noise, the crowds … maybe you’d love it! Or maybe you’d hate it.

But you’d like to have a say!

We need to extend the same courtesy to our dogs.

Do they really want to be hauled around a showground on a short lead, hot, bothered, nowhere to lie down?

And just before you say, “My dog’s FINE!” I want you to consider that if a dog is in a stimulating environment and keeps close to you, quiet, “no trouble at all”, this dog is most probably “shut down”.

She can’t escape the situation, so she keeps her head down and hopes it will all go away.

It’s a form of learned helplessness. She can’t cope, there’s nothing she can do, so she submits to the torment.

Go without the dog!

The fact is, there are things you enjoy, there are things your spouse enjoys, there are things your dog enjoys.

If everyone isn’t enjoying the outing, then - why not leave them at home?

And enjoy the happy greetings when you return exhausted from your outing!




Dog reactivity - what actually is it?


This post was first published on positively.com and reprinted with permission 

 

Got a reactive dog? A fearful, anxious, or aggressive dog? A dog who barks and lunges at everything she sees? This is just for you!

My three books on Growly Dogs - Essential Skills for your Growly but Brilliant Family Dog - are full of strategies and techniques to help you with your difficult dog, and I thought I’d give you a chapter from Book 1: Why is my dog so growly? to get you started on the road to change.

 

Chapter 1: Reactivity - what is it

“What do we mean by this word “reactivity”? Basically, it means that your dog is reacting to his environment, but that instead of being able to assess the situation calmly, make good judgements, and move on, he’s stuck in “See dog: bark!”

You may think your dog is weird - that one moment he’s a happy dog inside the house, and as soon as you step outside he turns into a snarly monster. Imagine you’re enjoying tea and cake at a friend’s house. You’re happy and relaxed. Then your friend takes you to see his reptile collection (Oh no!! Exactly what makes your skin crawl!). In that room full of snakes and lizards, do you feel as comfortable as you were in the tea-and-cake room? And when he opens the cage and offers you one to hold ... that’s when you may panic and need to get out of the room.

Have you ever felt anxious and jittery for some reason? Worried about an interview, perhaps, or waiting for news from the hospital. Every bang or squeak makes you jump! Imagine living in that state all the time.

And at the bottom of this is usually FEAR. The reason your dog is making such a hullabaloo at the sight of another dog (or person, bike, jogger, car, plastic bag, you-name-it) is because she’s trying to keep it away from her. Putting on an Oscar-winning display of teeth, claws, and noise usually does the trick.

The other person or dog may think, “This is a nasty dog, I’m outa here,” or you - in your embarrassment and confusion - take the dog away, or dive into someone’s driveway till the other has passed. Either way, for your dog, the barking and lunging worked! The threat is no longer there!

Sometimes this response is totally misunderstood by the owner, who says, “He drags me towards every dog because he wants to play”.

In a later chapter we’ll be looking in detail at Dog Body Language. It’s possible you are not recognising some of the things your dog is telling you! It will be much clearer when you’ve learnt his sophisticated method of communication.

 

“Dogs do what works” 

I will be saying this over and over again. Your dog doesn’t have a secret agenda to terrify the neighbourhood; she has no wish to fight with every dog she sees. All she wants is for the thing that’s coming at her to go away. And she’s discovered that her fear reaction of barking and prancing often works. So that’s what she’ll keep doing.

Until ... we show her another way to get the same result! Without anxiety, distress, and disarray.

Your dog is not aggressive, nasty, vicious - any of the names that passers-by may give her. She’s just afraid.

If this comes as a surprise to you, have a look at other aspects of your dog - around the house for instance. Does she jump at loud bangs? Does she bark at visitors? Is she deeply suspicious of any new object in her environment, creeping up slowly to inspect it on tippy-toes with outstretched neck? Does she get distressed when she’s left alone? Is it hard to brush her, or trim her feet?

All these can also be indicators of an anxious dog who is more likely to react to strange dogs, people, or things, when out.

And keep in mind that your dog can be afraid of anything at all. While many reactive dogs are reactive to other dogs, there are plenty who are just fine with other dogs, but terrified of traffic, or tractors, or people, or children ...

 

But my dog’s friendly!   

Another reason some dogs become reactive is frustration. They may really want to meet every dog or person in the world and expect a good outcome. This may work when they’re off-lead and able to get away (more about that later on), but it may also come apart quite quickly when the other dog doesn’t welcome the intrusion, or is much bigger and bolder than your dog first thought.

Off-lead this can result in a panic response where your dog snaps and barks before running away. There is scope for this to go badly wrong, if the other dog joins in the fray. On-lead the frustration grows very quickly, as the dog does not have the freedom to do what he wants, and little impulse control to deal with these feelings. So he barks and lunges towards the other dog.

The symptoms are the same as for the fear-barker - though the underlying cause is slightly different. This dog’s actions are often misunderstood by his owner, who fears they have an aggressive dog.

The frustrated dog may have poor social skills, racing up to a strange dog and hurling himself in their face, or on top of them. Imagine someone doing that to you in the street: you’d have a thing or two to say, I’m sure!

He may be stuck in puppyhood, thinking that racing up to every dog is ok. This dog needs to learn manners, just as our children do. We wouldn’t accept behaviour from a teenager or adult that we’d accept from a three-year-old child. It would be most inappropriate. And yet many owners think it’s ok that their dog should jump up at every dog they see, just because they think he’s friendly.

 

Jekyll on-lead, hyde off-lead? 

I find a lot of people saying to me that their dog is only reactive on-lead, and that off-lead “he’s fine!”

I can only say that I’ve never seen a dog-reactive dog who is “fine” off-lead. 

A little study of dog body language will reveal a lot of signs of discomfort in this dog. The only advantage of being off-lead is that the dog can get away before things get out of hand. And because this is not possible when he’s on-lead, we get the “fight or flight” result: b-a-r-k-i-n-g.”

It’s hard to do this alone - but you don’t have to! You can choose to work directly with me and my team of highly-qualified trainers. Start with the free Masterclass for Growly Dogs here

 

To read more of this book, go to www.brilliantfamilydog.com/growly-books where you’ll find all three books, available on Amazon in ebook and paperback - and a box-set of all of them at once!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Was your first dog your bestest dog ever?

My childhood dog was called Simon.

He was black and white and grey - a blue roan, in spaniel language - though much bigger than cocker spaniels tend to be nowadays, an old-fashioned version.

He was the same age as me, so we grew up together.

Harry Potter-like, he slept in the Singing Cupboard.

This was the same kitchen cupboard that housed the wireless, so he could enjoy “Music while you Work” and other such gems from post-war Britain while he dozed on his blankets. (No, he was never shut in the cupboard.)

In those days - especially in our suburban arcadia - it was normal for dogs to be loose. So our childhood adventures in the fields and on bikes were always accompanied by Simon.

Sometimes he wore sunglasses. Sometimes the poor dog had to wear shorts or a jumper. He took great pleasure in mucky pools and ditches, and he loved car rides.

He’d lie in front of the open fire and occasional coal explosions would result in a column of smoke rising from the sleeping dog’s thick coat. Very little bothered him.

Decades before dog agility was begun as a sport, I had jumps and hoops rigged up in the garden as a “showjumping course” for my dog.

So you can see where all this dog training came from!

Many people look back happily on their childhood, and the dog or dogs that pulled them through it.

It’s natural to want to re-create that for ourselves now, and especially for our family, so that our children can enjoy the same freedom and joy of having a devoted companion through the trials and tribulations of growing up.

But there are some things you need to keep in mind. 

🐾 There’ll never be another Simon.

There have been plenty of other charming canine individuals in my life - and I wouldn’t want to change a thing about them - but it’s not possible to re-create Simon. Each new dog brings his own personality to the party, and you have to work with what you have, not what you may wish you had.

🐾 Things have changed.

The happy-go-lucky life we enjoyed as children does not happen so much now. Dogs tend to be banned and barred from so many places that they don’t have the same social skills Simon had.

🐾 Breeds have changed.

What was once a suitable family pet is not necessarily now the case. You will have to dig deep here to find out what you need to know before inviting a particular breed into your home.

🐾 Memories are selective.

And as a child there’s an awful lot that I never knew or understood. My mother may have had a different view of having Simon - coloured by all the extra housework and possibly expense he may have caused. I never had to clean sick off the carpet - maybe it never happened. Maybe it happened a lot. I have no memory of that.

 🐾 On the plus side,

advances in understanding of dog behaviour and training have been so enormous over the past couple of decades, that all the help you need to rear the Brilliant Family Dog you want is available to you.

You just need to know where to look. Hint: keep reading!

By all means cherish the memories of your beloved childhood dog, and try and find his essence in a present-day equivalent.

That warm fuzzy glow of endless summer that I remember is far from being the whole picture!