Are you able to look after a dog?

So exciting, getting a puppy!

But also - especially if this is your first venture into having a companion dog - fraught with hazards!

In my efforts to make the transition from “new dog” to “family dog” as smooth as possible, I have provided you with many, many resources.

There are over 300 articles here, and most important of these are the three-part series on Choosing a Puppy. Start here.

There’s New Puppy!  - a handbook to get you through the first few months.

And there are various free and premium courses

Total mindset change

But the most important thing in preparing for your new puppy or new dog, is the total mindset change you’re going to need to make!

As any new first-time parent will tell you, the whole thing is mind-bending and requires a huge change in your lifestyle.

You have no idea of the effect this new baby will have on your life - till it happens!

This applies to four-footed family members too . . .

Resentment of the invasion?

It’s not uncommon for me to receive complaints from people who’ve just got a new puppy, and can’t understand why they can’t carry on their life exactly as before.

Maybe they think they’re getting a stuffed dog, or a bicycle, or something. Not a living, sentient, being - who has hopes and fears, feelings and sensations, needs and desires.

So seeing the puppy blamed for its distress and the new owner’s lack of sleep is upsetting for me.

Would they blame a baby for crying and disrupting their sleep? Of course not! They’d try to find out what’s wrong and put it right.

Some of these entitled people even re-home their unfortunate pups after only a few days. They seem to think their comfort is far more important than caring for this little creature they have chosen to bring into their home.

Perhaps it shows that they bought their puppy or dog on a whim, with no thought about whether they were suited to have a dog living with them for the next 12-15 years.

You should be prepared for total disruption to your life!

It also tells me that the person who sold them the puppy or dog was simply trying to shovel off excess animals with no care of where they went. This is all too common, I’m sorry to say, with those “greeders” who are just in it for a fast buck.

It’s no good taking five days off work and thinking that will do the trick for your new puppy.

And if you work full-time away from home, how are you going to manage a creature who cannot be left for more than four hours? If you’re relying on a family member to mind your dog while you’re out - for free - I can assure you that such arrangements frequently break down when the person involved realises what a huge commitment this is and that they’re being used.

Is it about you, or about the dog?

If you think your sleep is more important than your puppy’s wellbeing, think again.

And if you think that scamping on food - buying the cheapest and feeding as little as possible - is the way to go: oh oh oh. I hardly know where to begin.

I have had people tell me they feed two meals a day - to an 8 week old puppy! Even giant breed puppies! Then they wonder why the poor starving creature is crying all night.

If you fit this category, I question the breeder of the dog.

A good breeder is concerned about the wellbeing of her pups, so anyone who gets a puppy while being out of the house ten hours a day has clearly gone to a puppy farm.

I had to complete a detailed questionnaire and write an essay before I could be considered for my latest puppy!

This is NORMAL.

A good breeder devotes months of her life to rearing her precious pups. She’s not going to let them go to any-old-body who has no understanding of how to manage them.

Would local authorities hand over a child for adoption without in-depth investigation? One would hope not!

Start the right way!

So start the right way. Read this article and kick off by making some choices about who you want to share your life with. Then do some serious research into where you can source your chosen dog.

The right breeder will be keen to help you learn what you need, to have a great start with your pup.

And a reputable shelter will not want to make a mistake with one of their charges, and find it bounces back for further re-homing.

Starting an adventure with a new dog is a thrilling experience! And just like how the excitement and anticipation of planning a holiday is often as good as the holiday itself, so a preparation period while you learn and research is so important to the success of this new relationship.

Please avail of the many resources available to you, dismiss fanciful notions and deal with facts.

Here’s that Puppy Book for you: 

Got a reactive dog?

It’s a tough time for growly dogs - anxious, shy, fearful, “aggressive” dogs. 

Why?

Because, up in the top half of the planet, it’s been Winter.

And that means short days.

If you have a reactive dog, you’ll know exactly what the significance of this is!

It means there’s fewer hours of daylight for everyone to walk their dogs, therefore it’s much harder to avoid other people and their dogs on walks.

You have my sympathy - I know just what this is like!

Meeting or NOT meeting other dogs?

Now, you may be saying, “But how will my dog ever get better if he never meets other dogs?”

And I understand why you may think this.

You may have been given the idea that socialising your dog means exposing him to every dog possible, regardless of his reaction.

But in fact, he needs to learn how to cope with the world without the challenge of a strange dog looming towards him. Only then will he be able to manage passing another dog (or person - whatever it is that worries him, though we’ll stick with “dog” for now, as that’s usually the trigger) and not panic.

Once he has confidence that you will ensure he “never has to meet another dog again”, then he’ll know that there is a choice.

He doesn’t have to shriek and yap and leap about when he sees another dog coming, putting on a fearsome show of teeth, because he has learnt - from you - that you can both move away and not have to confront the oncoming dog.

How calm will that make him feel?

How safe will he feel?

See the dog ahead that Hector is able to avoid! 

No-one wants to go through life feeling scared. And you can help your dog to get braver and stop panicking with a few simple-to-teach techniques and some really useful strategies.

One of the quickest to teach is the Emergency Turn.

You’ll find the steps detailed in my free Masterclass for Growly Dogs here.

And once you’ve discovered the ease and joy of making your walks - even in these busy few hours of light - comfortable and fright-free, you may like to delve further into what I can show you.

That Masterclass will also introduce you to the From Growly Dog to Confident Dog program, with individual coaching and many lessons.

And you can get my renowned Growly Dog books direct from the author here

Perhaps you’ll find, like EB and GS here, that you can make a huge difference to your dog walks, your dog’s happiness, and your own peace of mind - with these simple, kind, methods.

“We have been using your approach to training our growly dog now for about 6 months and have seen an incredible difference! We love your kind approach to training our dog. Wow! Your kind, positive methods really work. I can't thank you enough.” EB

“Just wanted to let you know, as a professional dog trainer, I loved your three Growly Dog books.  Have recommended to all my reactive owners as you explain so simply and clearly what they need to learn, without baffling them with science. Just brilliant. I read a lot of books, articles and papers but rarely are they appropriate for pet owners to read and understand so these are just perfect.” GS

Dog training books for you at special prices!

I’m delighted to be able to announce a new improvement here at Brilliant Family Dog!

My immensely popular dog training books are now available for you to purchase as ebooks direct from me.

This cuts out the middle man, and enables me to share the savings and give you a special price! It also ensures you get your book immediately, direct to the e-reader or reading app of your choice, e.g. Nook, Kobo, Kindle, etc.

In fact, you don’t need a physical e-reader at all, as we give you a free app for your phone or desktop where you can read the books.

How easy is that?!

BOOKS, BOOKS, BOOKS!

The books are, of course, entirely force-free, and aim to build a stellar relationship between you and your Brilliant Family Dog. They’re easy to follow, with plenty of troubleshooting and case studies.

Here’s where you go to find which book will be best for you:

https://www.brilliantfamilydog.com/books

And here’s what a couple of readers told me just recently:

“I have all your books and I am loving working my way with Tally steadily through them. So far Calm Down! and Let’s Go! Both are transformative. I recommend you wherever I go especially on the group dog walk I do on a Saturday.” AK

“Your books are just brilliant! I’ve read every one cover to cover and it’s a revelation. Honestly I’ve spent 40 years doing what I thought was right - I hope thanks to you I’m getting it more right than I used to!” JP 

For now, you can purchase ebooks or audiobooks directly from me - it won’t be long before you can buy paperbacks too! Exciting times … watch this space!

Here is a chart from Amazon showing six of my books in the top 35 dog training books chart!

“Thank you. Your first book is brilliant, it has taught ME so much.” RN

“Excellent book! Not only for newcomers. 5* ”

“I have a whole library of doggy books and I found yours concise, easy to read, and full of very useful tips.” JC

“Brilliantly written with a compassionate and understanding voice.” SM

“Clear, simple and easy to follow and remember. I've read similar books, but almost all are much more wordy and hard to remember.” CM

https://www.brilliantfamilydog.com/books

Do you hit your dog?

Of course you don’t hit your dog!

You wouldn’t be here in Brilliant Family Dog if you did!

But the thing is, you don’t need to actually hit someone for them to feel bad about you.

This is so for dogs as well as for people.

Different forms of punishment

So you may ignore your dog. Lots of “dog trainers” tell you to do that.

Now imagine how you’d feel if a loved one ignored you! Refused to speak to you!

🐕 Wouldn’t you creep and crawl inside?

🐕 Feel like a worm?

🐕 Wonder what you’ve done to upset them?

🐕 No idea how to put things right?

That’s just how your dog would feel!

I think that if I offended someone, I’d much rather they explained to me how I had done so, so that I could put it right in the future, and not repeat my mistake.

So you can do the exact same with your dog.

Just show him that what he did didn’t work. Ask him again, and when he gives the smallest hint of doing what you’d prefer, reward that - fast and fully!

Dogs are Doers. They are not Not-Doers.

Leaving your dog in a vacuum of silence will not help him understand one bit.

Old saws are not necessarily right!

There’s a saying: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”

I couldn’t disagree more!

How someone feels about you is so important to you! If someone is unkind to you, or unfair, doesn’t that hurt? With real pain?

If they say harsh things, wag a finger, shout in your face, isn’t that frightening?

Your dog is the same!

Punishment rewards the punisher

You see, punishment rewards the punisher.

The only person who benefits is the person doing the punishing, in whatever form - whether hitting, shouting, abusing, belittling - they are the ones who get a gratifying feeling. Some even get a visceral thrill.

While punishment does little good to the one being punished.

Yes - it may temporarily suppress behaviour (just long enough for the so-called trainer to cash your cheque) - in the presence of the punisher. But it’s not going to stop it, because there is no CHOICE involved on the part of the victim.

Giving your dog, or child, or friend, or colleague, a choice in how they respond is critical for them to learn and want to repeat that choice.

Losing your temper

Yep! I put my hand up, along with the rest of the universe! We can all lose our temper, get frustrated, reach the end of our tether.

But if you give in to the moment and - even just yell at your dog - how does it make you feel?

Do you feel proud of yourself?

Or do you realise that you have just taken a chunk out of your relationship with your dog, which will have to be restored double-quick?

And what if children were watching? What have they learnt, about you, about how to manage people, how to manage animals?

What if another adult was watching? What do they now think of you? Do you like what they’re thinking?

Looking at things from an outside point of view can help us see more clearly what we are doing!

Yes, we can all have uncharacteristic outbursts. But before you justify yourself to yourself by saying the dog was driving you mad, was not listening, was being deliberately difficult - keep in mind that your dog is from another species. He doesn’t understand verbal language (he associates sounds, sure, but not as we do).

We are honoured to be able to forge an unbreakable bond with the dog in our care.

We are blessed to have this learning every day - of working out why creatures (people or dogs) do what they do, and how we can get them to fit in with our plans without any coercion, force, or intimidation.

Gobbledygook!

And if this all sounds like outer gobbledygook, do watch my free Workshop here . It shows you what may possibly be a new way to relate to your dog.

As this correspondent says:

“Your teaching is a revelation! Honestly I’ve spent 40 years doing what I thought was right. Now, as soon as my new puppy chooses to do something I want she gets a reward. I hope - thanks to you - I’m getting it more right than I used to.” JP

And that dog-owner had learnt all that from my books! Want to see what you can learn too? Head over to this page. And we can both benefit from you buying direct from the author (that's me!)

Is your new dog not as easy as your old dog?

Got a new puppy?

Exciting!

All your hopes for the perfect dog rest in this wide-eyed little ball of fluff!

And as soon as you get started with him, he fails.

But how on earth can an 8-week-old puppy be failing? 😱

He wees everywhere, he chews everything, he pulls on the lead, he keeps you awake and barks the house down when you leave …

This may all be true (HINT: it needn’t be! Your new puppy can be sleeping through the night from Day 1, never chew anything you don’t want him to, walk nicely on the lead, and be comfortable in your absence - start the Brilliant Family Dog program by watching this free Workshop)

So - maybe it’s true. But the reason you think your little puppy is failing, being difficult, challenging, awkward, time-consuming, and all the rest - is because you are comparing him with your previous dog!

Your old dog

Your old dog was perfect in every way.

Fitted your household like an old slipper.

• Never chewed anything

• Always asked if he needed to go out

• Walked nicely beside you and never ran off

• Slept like a log and greeted you happily when you came home.

And this too may be true.

But your old dog was 14 (or 12 or 17) when he died. He’d spent his whole life learning how to rub along with you.

And you’ve TOTALLY forgotten the anguish and trouble of his puppyhood!

You are seeing your lovely old pet through rose-tinted spectacles.

 Of course he took time to housetrain!

Of course he chewed things (whether they were things you wanted him to chew or things he stole is entirely down to your supervision at the time)

Of course he hauled you about on the lead (until you taught him different)

Of course the baby cried when you left him, till he learnt to trust you.

This is a NEW puppy

This is a NEW puppy. A NEW person. Yes, he’s a dog, and he may even be the same breed as your previous dog, but he is an individual.

And he needs to be treated and loved as an individual.

Not continually compared with the paragon which was your last dog in his last years.

For me, this is the joy of having a new puppy! A new person to get to know - his fears, his foibles, his character - what he enjoys, what he loves.

Your old dog was wonderful and your new dog will be wonderful too.

Just cut him some slack and learn with him and here’s that free Workshop where you can begin your journey with your new puppy:

Here’s a free Workshop to

get you started.

“Pandemic puppies” are now coming home to roost

Who do you know who became a first-time dog owner during lockdowns? There are about a million in the UK alone, according to evidence being given to a Commons (British Government) Select Committee investigating pet welfare and abuse.

Sadly, the huge demand for dogs when people were feeling lonely in the pandemic led to massive growth in the shadier sides of dog supply, from puppy farming to feed the demand for fashionable “designer dogs” (and there have been some high-profile shockers exposed recently, even in the dog training world) to the wholesale importation of random street dogs from other countries.

In both of these cases, the dogs are the ones who suffered most.

In the puppy farms the bitches and dogs suffer abuse and mistreatment. Along with their puppies they endure a deprived existence. What damage this does to the pups’ state of mind! What hope for them to become a well-adjusted adult dog?

The mass importation of any street-dog that can be netted and caught, mostly from East European countries with a poor reputation for animal treatment, leads to predictable problems of acclimatisation. Dogs who have known only fear and privation do not become perfect British pet dogs overnight!

But now the new owners are suffering!

Many of these first-time dog purchasers had done no homework. They had no idea about dog and puppy developmental stages, dog socialisation and habituation, suitable ways to rear a “normal” dog, and specialist ways to rehabilitate an abused or deprived dog.

They bought into the image of the perfect companion, apparently totally unaware that a dog can take from 18 to 36 months to mature and become anything resembling the finished article.

Many of these folk didn’t do what they should have been doing for their new dog, and this has naturally resulted in problem behaviours in some dogs - anything from separation anxiety to aggressive behaviour, not to mention incomplete housetraining, inappropriate playbiting, hauling them about on the lead, and zero recall.

So it’s no surprise that now people have gone back to work and are no longer lonely, the shelters are bulging with abandoned dogs.

Get a vet check!

One of those giving evidence, Dr. Gaines of the RSPCA, advised “anyone who had seen sudden behaviour changes in their dog to go to a vet, who will be able to rule out any medical causes.

“If the dog gets a clean bill of health, the owner should then seek help from an animal behaviour specialist, preferably one that is a member of the Animal Behaviour and Training Council.” (I’m a member of the ABTC.)

Note that Dr. Gaines does not want you to get behaviour modification advice or training from your vet! Their skills lie elsewhere. It’s a qualified trainer you need!

One of the problems with these pandemic puppies is that prices sky-rocketed due to the headlong rush to grab a dog - any dog - so that as well as getting a poor specimen in many cases, people had no money left for veterinary care or learning how to get the best out of their life with their dog, aka dog training.

Shady practices

Dealing with these heartless people who view dogs as commodities, simply there to make them money for the least amount of effort, is gradually being addressed by the lawmakers.

Puppy farming is a loathsome practice, and results only in distress for the “products” (dogs) and the “consumers” (people).

Capturing feral dogs and transporting them in large numbers across Europe in the back of a van is equally as abhorrent. Many dog trainers earn a lot of their (usually modest) incomes from trying to rehabilitate these unfortunate victims of the demand for dogs.

Dogs can actually learn all through their lives - though the worse the start the harder the change can be to accomplish. But never give up hope! There are wonderful kind and dog-friendly ways to help your dog cope with our strange world.

So where can I get a dog?

You can go to a proper breeder and get a puppy that has been reared with knowledge and with love. This normally means someone who breeds only when they want to keep a puppy themselves. Not someone with sheds full of random bitches kept in the dark.

Remember that in the UK Lucy’s Law requires that the mother should be seen with the puppies. Lots of dog greeders will come up with any excuse for not doing this - along with many other tricks of the trade - and some will park any old dog with the pups in order to deceive. You really do need advice from an experienced dog-person! Here’s an article to help you weave your way through the maze.

The shelters are bulging with rejected dogs right now, and yes, many of them will be foreign imports, so if you’re desperate for some reason to adopt a street-dog or a so-called designer dog, you can still do so without encouraging this dodgy trade.

Need a bit of help?

And if you’re having trouble with your dog, whether a pandemic puppy or not, we can help you! There are over 300 articles here at www.brilliantfamilydog.com and we have free workshops, masterclasses, email courses, books, and guides, along with low-cost online programs and books. Have a look at the menu at the top of this page to see them all.

There’s no need to miss out on getting a great life with your chosen pet, however inauspicious the start!

Here’s a free Workshop to get you started.