Do you have a rescue dog? Or do you have a *dog*?

Have a think.

When did you last describe your dog as a rescue dog?

Last week?

Yesterday?

Today??

Now, if you acquired your new dog just today, I can understand why you may feel the need to say this. You don’t need to, but we’ll come to that . . .

But if you rehomed your dog more than about five minutes ago, she is NOT a rescue dog! She’s YOUR dog!

Labels

We have a dreadful habit of applying labels to everything.

He’s a naughty child. They’re bossy people. That dog is stubborn.

The first thing to realise is that we’re labelling the PERSON because of their behaviour. Just because someone once did something should not colour our perception of them for ever!

The child was not naughty - he may have done something naughty, but that doesn’t mean you can add the label “naughty” so that you always regard his actions through the “naughty” lens.

Those bossy people maybe reacted poorly in a tricky situation. They didn’t handle it well. They’re not “bossy”. They just weren’t up to that task.

And as for the “stubborn” dog . . . if you’ve read any of my writings you’ll know that dogs are not stubborn. They simply don’t understand what you want of them, or don’t see the value in doing it. That means you haven’t taught them yet!

As the renowned Veterinary Behaviourist Karen Overall says (and I love this quote!),

“What we call something matters because it shapes how we think of it.”

Ditch the labels!

All this labelling is doing us - and the “labellees” a disservice. It is changing our perception of them, and alters our response to them.

If you’re told someone is a thief, you’re going to be very careful around them, watch your belongings, not leave them alone without supervision. It will totally govern how you are with them!

And if you label your dog a rescue - think why that is?

• Are you wanting sympathy and a big “Aahh” when you say it?

• Are you implying that anything your dog does is not your fault?

• Are you abdicating responsibility for teaching this dog - something you can’t deny responsibility for with a puppy you got at 8 weeks?

Whatever it is, ditch that label!

Can you see how it’s not serving you or your dog?

So now, next time you speak to someone about your dog - how are you going describe her?

And for more help with your dog - get our free email course on common dog problems! Lots of help for you there.

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Is love enough for your rescue dog?

• You want to rescue a dog from a shelter - fantastic!

• You’ve already rehomed the dog - amazing!

• You have lots of love to give this new dog - brilliant!

BUT … things don’t seem to be working out as you expected.

You wanted a cuddly dog, and this one hates being touched.

You wanted a dog to go on long walks with, but this one goes nuts as soon as he sees another dog.

You wanted a dog … like your last old dog, or like the dogs you see in the movies, and this one just isn’t measuring up.

Love alone is not enough.

What’s going wrong?

The fact is that this dog has been rehomed with you, without so much as a by-your-leave. And you have expectations of what this dog should be - which are not necessarily shared by the furry fellow himself!

You are at least his third home, in perhaps a few months. He’s been through - who knows what?

• Maybe he was just passively neglected so that he ran riot and his previous owners couldn’t be bothered with him any more.

• Maybe he was actively neglected and suffered torment and ill-health.

• Maybe he came from a puppy farm with zero socialisation and lots of fears.

• Maybe … you name it. You’re unlikely ever to know the truth about his past life. Though this is surprisingly unimportant, in fact.

The thing is, he has a history. And that history is not conducive to making him the dog of your dreams … yet!

You have to put a lot of work in to make a new life for your dog and for you. You expect him to adapt - how about you doing some adapting too?

If he can’t bear to be touched, get help on desensitising him to touch and learning to enjoy it.

If he hates walks and is afraid of other dogs - stop walking him where he’ll see other dogs! First build up a solid relationship of trust between you (yes, both ways) and with professional help slowly introduce him to the joyful aspects of the great outdoors.

If he came from a puppy farm with poor nutrition and no normal socialisation, you can improve his food massively, but trying to undo the lack of socialisation is a long road. But with help, you’ll get there.

Here’s a list of things to do with your newly-rehomed dog:

Remember it’s all new to him! Treat him as a puppy - start from scratch.

1. Keep your new pet in one room of the house to begin with, preferably using a crate when you can't supervise so that nothing can get chewed. Gradually give him more freedom and access to more rooms as he proves reliable.

2. Institute a Puppy Housetraining regime to help your dog know where he may relieve himself, and be really pleased with him when he gets it right.

3. Handfeed as many meals as possible instead of putting down a bowl of food, or you can use food toys like kongs.

4. Never leave any dog alone with any child, not even while you answer the phone. If you leave the room, always take either the dog or the child with you.

5. Resist the temptation to take him out for more than brief walks on lead for the first few weeks. Limit the new experiences he has to face - that includes friendly neighbours and visitors, and most especially other dogs. A rescue dog typically takes 1-2 months to settle into a new home - give him plenty of time. You have the rest of his life to take him everywhere with you.

6. In a few weeks' time, start learning with a force-free trainer. Good classes fill fast, so enrol straight away. No suitable local class? We’ve got you covered! Start here. If you have any problem behaviours before then, seek professional advice quickly, before they become a habit. Avoid those who talk of Dominance or Pack Theory.

7. Dogs don't "look guilty" or "know they've done wrong". They do look anxious if they see you are cross with them (though they may have no idea why). If you start telling your dog off for breaking house rules he didn't know existed you are going to have a hard time earning his trust.

8. Good habits are as hard to break as bad habits, so start as you mean to continue from the moment your dog comes through the door.

9. Most of your free time with your dog should be spent teaching him how to play with toys with you!

And you’ll find this free e-course enormously helpful!

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New rescue dog? Start here!

I get plenty of emails that begin, “We’ve just adopted an adult dog and he’s a nightmare to walk. He barks and lunges at everything and has damaged my shoulder …”

My first suggestion?

Don’t take your brand-new dog out for walks!

Shock! Horror! But don’t dogs have to be walked every day?

Nope. They don’t. As long as they get exercise - and that can be from playing games in your home and garden - they’re ok.

And if the walks are upsetting them that much, they definitely don’t need to be walked!

This dog has just arrived with you. His world is totally upside down - and may have been for months if he’s previously had a hard time, been booted out, and spent time in a shelter.

He needs time.

He needs time to learn to trust you.

And he needs time to build his confidence so that he can cope with the outside world - a world he may have had no experience of at all!

He may never have been out on walks in his first home, and in the shelter he probably never went off the premises.

So the outside world is a very scary place for him! And his only recourse is to try to put on an aggressive display to keep it away from him.

Familiarity does not bring peace, necessarily

So the best thing is to keep him home, in his new safe place. Keep working with him to build up his confidence in you and everything else. 

This will take time!

It can take at least eight weeks for a dog to settle into a new home. And in this time he’ll start to exhibit new things. Maybe he was always very quiet and biddable, and now he’s become rambunctious and “naughty”?

This is a good thing! It shows he’s settling in with you and able to act naturally.

And now you’ve got something you can really work with. It’s the ideal time to embark on a program of force-free training and fun, if you haven’t already done that.

Learning together is a wonderful way to bond with your new dog, to build that companionship you’ll both enjoy for the rest of his life.

Get a helping hand

But starting out with a new dog - possibly as a first-time dog-owner - is not always easy. And this is where working with someone who knows what’s what will really help.

You can start with our free Workshop and in just a few weeks you’ll be at a level where you can teach your dog some fun tricks!

And if your dog is the one at the top of this post, who is terrified of everything outside - then the free Masterclass is where you need to be, right now.

Both these webinars are packed with tips and strategies to get you off on the right foot with your dog - whether brand-new or comfortably ensconced in your home.

Do you have a dog, or a “rescue dog”?

There’s so much of what we do with our dogs that is down to us. Often the dog doesn’t have to do a thing - it’s a question of changing our mindset.

“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” Wayne Dyer

 AND THEN you can change the way you find solutions.

Many of you write to me and introduce your dog as a “rescue dog”. I hear it all the time.

NO!

As soon as that dog comes through your door, he’s YOUR dog! His history - if you have the truth, which is not all that likely - may be useful in unravelling a few of his mysteries.

But what went before is not of much help to us now.

We start from where we are

You have to ask yourself why you refer to your dog as a Rescue Dog?

Is it because of the sympathetic “Ahhh” you get from other people?

Or are you perhaps saying that anything bad he does is not your fault?

Supposing you had an adopted daughter. Would you introduce her as “This is Miranda. She’s adopted.”

NOOOO! Of course you wouldn’t!

You’d say “this is Miranda, she loves swimming.”

If you say “she’s adopted,” you’re abdicating responsibility for how she is.

You’re saying you didn’t have anything to do with her earlier life so you can’t be blamed for her poor behaviour.

Can that be why you maintain that your dog is a rescue dog? Even after all these years? Some of you have had your “rescue dog” for 5 - 8 - 10 years!

The celebrated Veterinary Behaviourist Karen Overall says:

“What we call something matters because it shapes how we think of it.” Karen Overall

 You don’t want to think of your daughter as a changeling for all of her life. And you don’t need to see your dog as a “rescue”, or give him any more labels to explain away his behaviour as something carved in stone. 

What words can I use?

I’ll often suggest a different wording to describe something. This is entirely because I want you to SEE it differently. 

Maybe you call your dog stubborn, or obstinate, or dominant, or just plain difficult?

Every time we pin a label on our dog we are making another judgment.

There are a number of trendy new labels doing the rounds at the moment - which suggest that your dog is fixed in his responses - unchangeable because that’s the way he is. That he’s born with a certain mindset or outlook on life, and is incapable of change.

This is as absurd as thinking Miranda can never grow up to be a fulfilled human being because she had a rocky start.

How many shy children, for example, grow up to become public speakers, or capable professionals?

I mention shy, reactive, anxious, or aggressive dogs. These are all very different! Your dog may be one and not any of the others.

Now it does help to have something to indicate that the dog doesn’t necessarily behave as people expect dogs to.

Growly Dogs (don’t we love ‘em!)

This is why I use the term GROWLY. It describes a symptom rather than a disease.

It describes what the dog is DOING, not what the dog IS.

I’m going to say that again, to be sure that you GET IT: 

It describes what the dog is DOING, not what the dog IS.

It doesn’t ascribe motive or reason - it simply says that growly - uncomfortable - is how this dog may respond.

So I’d like you to take a look at all the labels you attach to your dog. What they are, when you use them, and - most importantly - WHY?

If you truly want to change how things are with your Growly Dog - or any dog, for that matter - you won’t want to stick him in a box, seal it, stamp it, and say “That’s it.”

The way is always open for us to change, and changing our perception is the first step.

For more help with changing your thinking, check out www.beverleycourtney.com/blog/the-winds-will-blow

Want to leave your dog’s history behind and start a new life together? Start with this free Masterclass, and talk to me in the chat. I WILL understand you, and I will respond and help you as best I can.